Social media, society, and personal expectations can put great pressure on women and girls about how they should look, behave, and live their lives. More often than not, those expectations not only set an unrealistic standard of beauty which most women can’t ever achieve. They also can put a woman’s health at risk, exclude her from social life, and make her unhappy. Learn what you can do now to put that pressure away, and “fall” in love with yourself again this season.

According to the Dove Global Beauty and Confidence Report made in 2016, 79% (16 in 20) of young girls and 85% (17 in 20) of women have opted out of important life events such as engaging with friends and loved ones because they felt they didn’t look good enough. The more recent research made in 2020 shows increased numbers, 80% (8 in 10) girls and 90% (9 in 10) women avoiding important life activities because they don’t feel good about the way they look.

The common beliefs are:

• That women’s bodies must look a certain way, otherwise, they are not worthy
• That women’s bodies “exist” for the pleasure and service of others
• That women have to behave a certain way
• That women’s bodies are up for public commentary, scrutiny, and debate
• That women should not “take up space”

When society puts so much pressure and expectations on you, no wonder that sometimes you start thinking the same way about yourself. As a result, you might hate looking in the mirror, beat yourself up when you ate more than you think you should have, feel guilty when you said “No” to a friend, and assume you don’t deserve to get a promotion at your job.

But guess what? You are worthy, you are capable, and you are beautiful the way you are.

You have every right to set boundaries for your own sake, and you definitely don’t have to feel guilty about it.

It is tough, but you can challenge these beliefs and fall in love with yourself again:

• Surround yourself with people who inspire you instead of bringing you down. This also includes your social media: unfollow all accounts that make you feel bad about yourself.
• Watch your language. When you notice you’re getting down on yourself, interrupt the thoughts, and remind yourself that you are worthy no matter what.
• When following a diet, stop focusing on the scale and your appearance. Instead, think about it as a form of self-care. Choose more nutritious food, go for a walk, meditate, write a diary focusing on your feelings instead of how you look.
• Try a new hobby you’ve always wanted to.
• Book a course to learn new things.
• Visit a mental health provider if you feel like it. There is nothing to be ashamed of, and it can be life-changing!
• Speak up if you have the opportunity: in life situations or work meetings. You deserve your voice to be heard.
• Treat yourself with small or big things: buy for yourself a delicious cup of coffee, flowers, new make-up or clothing, or maybe even that cool sports car you were eyeballing for a while.
• Accept and love your body as it is. It doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t or can’t strive for more. However, everything takes time, and our bodies are changing continuously. And it’s ok! Your body is your unique story, which is worthy of falling in love with at every moment.