In a culture that teaches us to base our self-worth off of our appearance, it can be easy to end up on a constant quest to “fix” something that was never broken.

The diet industry is a $78 billion industry (Marketdata Enterprises) that profits from teaching us at a young age that our bodies are objects that can and should be molded to fit a societal ideal, and selling us dozens of “solutions” to “fix” our bodies. As we grow older, we throw countless amounts of mental, physical and financial energy toward this quest, yet no matter how much we invest into obtaining the “ideal body”, our perception of our body as “flawed” and “disappointing” rarely changes.

This is because our perceptions of ourselves and our bodies are influenced by things we’ve heard, seen, learned and experienced our whole lives, many of which have been influenced by the diet industry.

Hatred of our bodies intensifies when we try to perceive ourselves as we think others would, rather than learning to live in tune with ourselves and our needs. We start to paint a picture of how we think our body looks to others. The more we do that, the more we objectify ourselves and the less our body feels like home.

If it feels like your brain is wired to find fault with your body, you’re not alone.

According to Dove, 8 out of 10 girls are so concerned about their appearance that they opt out of important life events.

Let’s change that.

By using body gratitude, we can shift how we talk, think and feel about our bodies, and ultimately how much control we allow our body image to have over our lives.

Through a phenomenon called neuroplasticity, you can train your brain just like a muscle, and practicing gratitude (specifically body gratitude) is a great place to start.

The intention behind practicing gratitude for your body is not to change your body (although it may improve stress levels, reduce cortisol, result in a healthier relationship with food and exercise, and improve your overall health), but rather to change how you see your body.

That perspective shift is important because your perception influences EVERYTHING.

Your perception of your body can increase stress levels, feelings of hopelessness, low self-worth, body dysmorphia and body dissatisfaction, or it can increase body satisfaction, self-esteem, hopefulness and quality of life.

Gratitude can change your life because it can change your brain. Practicing body gratitude can form new neural pathways. But, just like going to the gym, you have to train your brain consistently for progress to occur.

If neural pathways are a new concept, you can think of it a little like walking down a path in the woods. The pathway is defined from years of using it, but you see something off the trail that you want to go check out. The only way to get there is to carve out a new path.

Because the path isn’t well defined, it may take many attempts to get there, but each time you try, things become a little clearer. Creating new neural pathways may feel a little bit like you’re tripping over roots, getting stuck in the mud, and fighting your way through cobwebs to get to this new destination. You might even need to chop down some branches along the way. Eventually, the path will be free from branches, you may recognize your whereabouts from the last attempt, and the route will be better defined.

Rewiring your brain works similarly. The path that you’ve always taken is the neural pathway you’ve always used, for example, picking your body apart.

But what if each time you wanted to find something wrong with your body, you found something to be grateful for about your body instead?

That moment is a conscious choice to step off the path you’ve always taken. It may be scary, uncomfortable and overwhelming at first. It feels safer to hop back on your familiar path, but with time, practice and consistency, you can create a new pathway instead.

It sounds great, right? But, where do you even start?

First, let’s break down the difference between body love and body gratitude.

Loving your body seems to be the ultimate goal that social media promotes, right? But they don’t really tell you what that means or how to get there. Does body love mean loving how your body looks or loving your body for what it is?

Body gratitude promotes loving your body for what it is, rather than how it looks.

That’s the difference between saying, “I love how my stomach looks” and “I love how strong my core is”.

A strong core is important. It’s what keeps you standing upright, keeps your back strong and healthy, lets you chase after and carry your pets or kids, switch from sitting to standing, not fall on your face walking through ice, and do most of the things you love in life. That’s not an insignificant list.

But, despite all your core does for you, chances are, you’ve never said “thank you”, because you’re focusing on all the ways you think your stomach is holding you back rather than helping you live.

Despite popular belief, having a six-pack doesn’t mean your core is strong. I can tell you firsthand from when I broke my back (twice) with a visible six-pack, and was told by multiple specialists that my core was weak. And, despite what the media sells us, you can’t see health. Existing in a smaller or more toned body does not automatically mean that you have a healthier or better body. (U.S National Health Interview Survey).

Yet, the diet industry sells us this idea of achieving happiness, confidence and healthiness when we look a certain way.

So, we start objectifying ourselves and picking apart natural parts of ourselves as flaws, not realizing that how we feel about our body has nothing to do with our actual body and everything to do with how we’ve been taught to feel about our body. Essentially, we allow society to objectify us and then set the standard of how we are allowed to feel about ourselves.

You’d be pissed if someone else objectified you right? Then why do it to yourself?

Even setting loving how our body looks as the goal, we are still objectifying ourselves and basing our self-worth on whether or not our body fits into society’s ever-changing definition of beauty, causing your body to ultimately feel more like a damaged object and less like home, especially when the standards shift again. Chasing that societal validation is like playing limbo under a constantly moving bar.

When you learn to find appreciation for everything your body DOES for you, it becomes much easier to accept (and maybe even love) your body for what it is rather than how it looks.

Your body is the vehicle that allows you to think, feel, create, and experience life. Its job is to function, not fashion. How your body looks is the least important thing about you.

Remember that you are not your body.

You live in your body, but you are so much more than your body.

I’m sorry if you’ve been made to believe that how your body looks is the most important thing about you. It’s not.

I recognize that there are so many bodies that are not valued by our society and the privilege that I hold while writing this statement.

I see so many amazing clients and women constantly angry at their bodies for not matching consistently changing societal norms, instead of angry at the system that makes them believe that their bodies are the problem in the first place.

Let’s change that.

It’s hard to love something you’ve hated your whole life. I know you’re tired of feeling this way, but remember that you don’t need to conquer the whole mountain at once. Start with one step and the expectation that change won’t happen in a day, a month or maybe even a year…

And it doesn’t happen at all if you don’t choose a new path consistently.

My challenge to you today and every day is to try thanking your body for existing, for allowing you to do the things you love, and for always fighting for you,

Thank you, body.